We all have moments in our marriage when we really need that pick-up, whether they are little issues that are starting to grow, or major issues that have come to a breaking point. There are millions of businesses out there that try to hook you in during your most desperate hours with seminars, books, and getaways. We think that if we shell out a chunk of money, we can have that old spark back again. But what happens after the seminar is over? Or the the last page is read? Or you re-immerse yourself back into the trials of everyday life and leave your carefree cabana behind you? Rather than shelling out a lot of money for temporary fixes, try this:
Play a board game.That's it. That is my free marriage advice. No gimmicks. No fees. Just a simple method that has been around for centuries. You can buy one on clearance, at a yard sale, or even make your own. The key is to spend time together with no distractions. You can play anytime you like without having to put in for vacation time or take out a second mortgage. By just interacting with one another on common, carefree ground, you will be amazed at the changes you will see.
Want to amp it up a notch? Select your spouse's favorite game, even if you cannot stand it. Don't gripe or complain about how much you don't like it. Just play it and enjoy that your spouse is enjoying it. Whenever you do something nice for your spouse, it makes them feel good and in turn you feel good. This simple gesture shows a large commitment to their feelings and how much you value those feelings. Just the other night, I suffered through a couple hours of a torturous game of Risk. I knew my husband would beat me. I knew he would gloat about it. And I knew the constant rolling of the dice would begin to bore me. But none of that mattered because he was thrilled. We barely have the time for such a long game and I could tell it meant a lot to him when I offered out of the blue.
The next time you sit down to play, offer to play their favorite game again. If they say it's your turn to pick your favorite, great! Pick one and enjoy! However, if they still want to play that same boring game you can't stand, play it. No complaining. No silent resentment that they didn't offer to play your game. It is not about giving them what they want to ultimately get what you want. It is about genuinely wanting to please them for the sole joy of pleasing them.
A successful marriage is not rooted in give and take. Rather it is in the heart of just giving. When you focus on giving, you will never have to take anything because it will all be given back to you in the long run.
So I challenge you to put a little Monopoly, Sorry, or Risk in your marriage. Love does not have to come at a high price.
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